Lorelei's Diary

Monsieur Harmon -- I know you rarely take a political tone in Harmony text but for everyone's sake you ought to do so now! Please insert a small box into the next issue encouraging the readers to write --for example "We Need Your Input/ Please write to us your views on the current activities of S.T.O.P. and other groups seeking to control 'hardcore' 'obscene' 'pornography' (We also suggest you write your congressman)." It disturbs me that the public isn't in an informed position to evaluate the biased messages they're currently receiving from the media! I took a college course on the effects of pornography. The primary emphasis the professor made again and again was that pornography/erotica must be received by the viewer accompanied by education.

Like any media, lack of personal education can lead an individual to misinterpret and misunderstand the information. An uneducated person will (probably) view our bondage fantasies and bondage realities with confusion. They might perceive women as actual victims, they might perceive annihilation of will, they might perceive coercive personalities... but if an individual representative of these interests sits down with them, and personally explains the concept of Love Bondage and shared fantasy, that person could view the photographs and texts in a positive way. They could perceive the participating women as satisfied individuals instead of viewing them from stereotypes.

I don't want to be stereotyped! Until someone serves as guide, people will unwittingly dehumanize me with their prejudices. (Sexism!/Erasure.) I'm so angry at our culture's dehumanization of my desires and search for fulfillment... I have a right to the "pursuit of happiness" and some of my happiness involves photography of bondage.

I wish they'd understand that they need to attack actual crimes where pornography is simply an aspect of an actual crime (for example filmed actual rape or photos of coerced children). Consent erotica mustn't be restricted -- but these people don't see the difference!

There's nothing "obscene" about the images of our fantasies and the images of our unusual lives. It frightens me that strangers could dream of "freeing" me from what enabled me to freely accept my inner self. These people think they're saving me by destroying my freedom of choice. But what threatened to ruin me was my initial refusal to accept my fantasies!

I believed that as a feminist I was responsible for having "healthy" fantasies. I failed to understand that in feminism we should seek full freedom to be ourselves -- whether we want to run a business, join a harem, shave our legs, be a doctor, not wear bras, or play bondage games... We can't find happiness by trying to mold to a feminist ideal, but rather: by finding a personal identity in this world which will provide satisfaction and fulfillment.

Unfortunately the feminist community and education failed to explain this to me when I was an impressionable teenager, easily influenced by their teaching. I've since drawn away from their identification: I'm not so much a feminist (one who believes in the equality and potential of women) as a humanist (one who believes in the equality and potential of people).

The concept of equality includes each individual's right to pursue happiness. It's maddenly ironic that these anti-pornography groups believe they are trying to ensure my happiness!!

Well god, enough agonizing -- the only people I can educate are those I talk to personally. I just wish I could talk to the whole nation personally.

On that subject, I've worried about you wanting me to be "more discreet" when I come out to work for Harmony. Does thìs mean that even in my private life, when I move out there, I have to keep my mouth shut about my interest? For example, at Rocky Horror it's common knowledge what I like, and because of my openness I've helped shape the attitudes of the theater-goers. I'd feel strange if I couldn't bring it up in conversation any more...

So, what have I been up to. The photos are back from my pen pal visit, but I haven't gotten copies yet so you'll have to wait. He was a lot of fun and we got along well. It's too bad he lives so far away (he happened to be in-state visiting family). He tied me to a chair (I hogtied him first though -- equality ya know) and managed to get my elbows together in back very comfortably by using a lot of rope. This distributed the pressure so evenly up the arms that my hands didn't fall asleep. I was very comfortable. I do love to have my elbows together.

Once again this last weekend I got to tie up the "Rocky" character while performing Janet's solo "Touch Me." This time I used more rope and he was just as accomodating as the first time. I ought to ask him to model soon, since he's very attractive.

A few days ago I tied Krystal spread-eagle to the hood of my car. As soon as I get another paycheck & can afford reprints I'll send some shots to you -- I think you'll like them.

I've got two dozen pen pals now and I'm managing to keep up. I'll be meeting some of them next month. Don't worry, I'm being very careful, and Jace sticks around to observe my safety. I have a shoot coming up with Puck and I'm really excited about it because I finally got my corset back (I had to send them a registered complaint letter) -- I'm going to wear the corset with a gypsy outfit and it ought to look really cute! We're also going to try suspension again.

Bye bye

--Ki

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